Tag Archives: sex

Waiting for Pizza

A couple waiting for pizza was charged with indecent behaviour last year. Both partners pleaded guilty. It was kind of senseless to do otherwise: everything was caught on a security camera.

The couple ordered a stuffed crust pizza and thinking of that nice, juicy, stuffed crust got their juices flowing. Unable to wait ’till they got home they decided to go for it, right then and there, against the Domino’s pizza counter. The security cam registered them having oral sex and intercourse for 18 minutes, quite an accomplishment on an empty stomach!

The couple had been spared jail time. They were given 12 month community orders and a sex-month curfew which prohibits them from leaving their houses between 7pm and 7am. We would suggest firing the Domino’s worker that took 18 minutes to prepare a stuffed crust pizza in the first place!

The original footage can be found on youtube

Car Lover

van_grillIn Dayton, Ohio, a man was arrested for having sex with a van. Now we know there are girls out there described as ‘vans’, but in this case the van was a solid van. The man stuck his penis in the grill of the van and started to have sex with it. The man was arrested and charged with public indecency.

Over the years many people have been caught having sex with unusual objects. Another man from the lovely state of Ohio (Hamilton) was arrested multiple times for having sex with his pool raft. He didn’t even bother to draw a face on it. His neighbours reported the man who was then arrested for the 5th time for public indecency… you can’t even love pool rafts anymore. Maybe he should have used the one in his own pool…

Not only the US has weird couples. In Sweden a man attempted to have intercourse with a wasps nest! Now, we reckon that’s not a very smart idea for obvious reasons. His attempt succeeded, evidence was found on the nest that implies the man managed to reach satisfaction, but over 50 wasp stings in his genitals and 100 more on the rest of his body was a little bit too much. He died.

Other object people have been caught in intimate relations with include sofa’s, pizzas, bicycles and picnic tables… Ew… Again in Ohio, Bellevue this time, a man was videotaped by his neighbor whilst having sex with a picnic table. We wonder what’s more perverted, having sex with a picnic table or videotaping your neighbour while doing so…

In Hong Kong a man was arrested when he got himself caught in an intimate rendezvous with a park bench. He stuck his manhood through a hole in the bench and got stuck. The man had to be transported to the hospital, bench and all, where it took 4 hours to cut him loose. 4 hours is more than what most people get.

which-way-traffic-signs

A man from Sioux Falls, South Dakota was arrested after being chased out of his neighbor’s yard with his video camera. The footage shot showed the man masturbating and having sex with traffic signs. Police couldn’t go through all the material. Over the years the man collected 2 years worth of coverage of the man having sex with traffic  signs.

In the UK a man was caught having sex with a dead deer. After being arrested the man told the police he found the deer lying in a ditch and moved the corpse into the woods where he consummated his endeavor. He was charged with ‘sexual gratification with an animal’ – bestiality in lamers terms – his defence claimed that a carcass however does not qualify as an animal. The man had a previous conviction of shooting dead a horse so he could have sex with it. Weird fellow…

 

Australia equips Olympic team with extra safe condoms

1463292120600The Australian pharmaceutical company Starpharma announced it will supply extra safe condoms for the 2016 Olympic games in Rio de Janeiro in Brazil. The reason is that they want to be extra safe against the Zika Virus. Now that it turned out that the Zika virus is sexually transferable Australia wants to be as safe as possible.

We honestly believe that the biggest risk is getting bitten by a mosquito while actually performing the deed you need that condom for in the first place. So unless the Zika virus gives sperm cells the change to bite their way through a regular condom we don’t think this will make sex much safer for the Australian Olympic team.

To us this raises another question: how many condoms are there bein used during these olympics? We’ll get back to you on that!

good cause

156e7b777b6a3c8.50723790Did you know there’s an organisation out there that has sex in public in order to put focus on saving the environment? We believe any excuse for good sex is a good excuse, these people take it one step further and actually came up with a good cause. Why not? They started in 2004 and actually built up quite a fan base. Their donations helped support a lot of projects. You can find them at fuckforforest.com!

I guess they really give a fuck!